Can I Explore the World with You?

Warning: this is a drama of an only child

(c) http://www.sptimes.com/2007/06/10/images/xlarge/PascoN_paslane_1697735.jpg

I am not really comfortable talking about this with other people, but I just wanna speak this one out. Just now. 

I am an only child and I never really did grew up getting everything I want. Though admittedly, my parents are not really that strict when it comes to house rules. I am not spoiled, or at least I think I'm not. I don't consider myself as one of those rich kids who always tend to get what they want. 

But I am someone who have always wanted a lot of things. I have that tendency of feeling really disappointed when I don't get what my parents had promised me (though I was the one who actually forced them to make that promise :/). But I've learned to deal with that. I've learned to somehow manage that attitude I have. But there are really these times wherein I could no longer handle myself...

Here's my problem... I have always wanted to explore the world, to go to different places, to experience a lot of things. And I always long to achieve those with my parents. I am jealous of those people whose parents are the ones initiating going to various places for vacation, etc. I understand... We don't really have a budget for such extra-activities. But I can't help feeling like..... "Can't I experience going somewhere with you even just once every 2 years?" 

I go out with my friends, with my boyfriend, with my classmates. We go to the malls (where you won't even want to go), watch movies, shop for things, go out of town (well, for field trips), sleep over at someone's house, drink 'til we're drunk, etc. But you know what? Even though I'm happy with their company, I am still wishing that we could also have those types of get-together. Well it will not completely be the same, of course. It will be a different one. But the thing is, I am with you and we're doing the things I've always dreamed of doing with you...

Maybe I am really being childish. Maybe I'm being irrational. But this is what I've always kept with me ever since. This doesn't mean that I love them less, it's just that, there are certain things that my heart is longing for. I'll always be thankful for everything they've given me. And I'll always love them no matter what. I'm just letting this out. I'm just really feeling bad...