Just. Keep. Swimming.

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Some days are good, some are not. Some days will be sunny, and some will be gloomy. Some days will make us smile, and some will make us cry. And sometimes, these days will surprise you by being there all at once. 

I've always thought that life is better inside my head. It's more under control, stable, and yes, it has its infinite number of happy endings. However, life, in reality, sucks the hell out of me. Just when I thought I'm having it all, something comes up and leads me back to the darkness. Despite this, I've been trying my hardest to not drown in my own hell. I've been trying my best to be the strongest that I can be, not just for myself, but for the people I love as well. I've been trying so hard to keep going, to keep seeing the light, despite the impossibility of it sometimes. I've been trying so hard to shake off all the negative things, just to keep moving forward. 

But sometimes, I give up. I surrender. I take a break.

Just because someone's a fighter, doesn't mean they don't get tired. Sometimes, we all need a little pause to help us regain ourselves. Sometimes we all need to distance ourselves from everything, to help us discover more of who and what we are becoming. Sometimes, we need time to heal the wounds that we never even thought was there.

And when life throws me into a battlefield again, I'll know that I'll be ready now. I'll be ready to fight again. And I'm going to be the best that my mind tells me to be. I am going to endure every challenge, every pain, everything.

Because I am a fighter...

...and no matter what happens, I'll just keep swimming. We'll just keep swimming. And we'll always make it through.

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Unplug. Detox.

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I know it's been a while since my last post here, and I probably have a couple of drafts that I've yet to publish, but this one seems to be a perfect breaker for everything that's going on inside my head right now.

So I've decided to cut off my Facebook and FBM consumption, primarily because I hated people posting subtle or not-so-subtle spoilers about the Avengers, but now, I've actually discovered a whole new purpose why I needed a detox. 

After some time, I came to realize that I needed to detach while I am trying to fix myself back together. I have to limit my interactions with everyone around me, so I could try to ponder on who I've become, and on how can I transform myself into a better version of who I am. I've been feeling really tired lately for no apparent reason, and as much as spas and Netflix are keeping my mind occupied, I still feel like a shit all over the bathroom floor.

So for this reason, I'm keeping a really few people in touch and I'll be back once I feel like I've overcome this phase that I am currently in right now.

I know I'll be fine again. I know I'll get to find my light sooner or later. I know that that woman will be at the end of this dark and lonely tunnel that I've been trudging for weeks now.

Until then.

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