Saturday, March 16, 2013

At the end of the day...

Sometimes I feel like you're ignoring me on purpose.
Sometimes I feel like you don't care.
Sometimes I feel like you can't understand me.
Or maybe you just don't.

Every time I feel bad about the way you're treating me, I sometimes wonder if this is worth it. I tend to question myself if this is what I really want.

Guess what.

I always end up realizing that despite everything, I still love you and I still think that what we have is worth it and I still find myself saying, "This is what I want. Who I want. What I love. Who I love."

Maybe I was just overreacting. I wasn't thinking clearly. I'm complicated. And so are you. Our points of view clash. You find me unreasonable and shallow, I find you proud and arrogant. But despite these things, we still try to work things out. We try to fix what seems to be broken even though we know that the damage could not be undone...

I am too emotional and I am really difficult to deal with. I know that, honey. I do things you think I shouldn't, I overreact when you think you've done nothing wrong. I easily get jealous and upset. I can't get over with your past relationship(or relationships?). I ask for too much. I sometimes(always?) demand for your time and attention without considering that you also have other priorities to deal with. I complain about simple things, making them more complicated. But, I am.... the girl you've chosen to love.

And at the end of the day, when things go wrong and you complain about how shallow and unreasonable and sensitive I am, I wish you'd end up saying "Mahal ko siya eh," rather than just giving a gesture w/c shows disappointment and "I don't really wanna give a fuck anymore."

Maybe I just want to feel that even when you're upset, you're still on my side. And you're still choosing to stay.


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